- Women now have choices. They can be married, not married, have a job, not have a job, be married with children, unmarried with children. Men have the same choice we've always had: work or prison.
- Tim Allen
- I love the lines the men use to get us into bed. 'Please, I'll only put it in for a minute.' What am I, a microwave?
- Beverly Mickens
- When I eventually met Mr Right I had no idea that his first name was Always.
- Rita Rudner
- My mom said the only reason men are alive is for lawn care and vehicle maintenance.
- Tim Allen
- Men have a much better time of it than women. For one thing, they marry later, for another thing, they die earlier.
- H. L. Mencken
- He was so mean it hurt him to go to the bathroom.
- Britt Ekland (on Rod Stewart)
- Men are simple things. They can survive a whole weekend with only three things: beer, boxer shorts and batteries for the remote control.
- Diana Jordan
- Perfect numbers like perfect men are very rare.
- Rene Descartes
- A succesful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A succesful woman is one who can find such a man.
- Lana Turner
- Man - a figment of God's imagination.
- Mark Twain
- The surest way to make a monkey of a man is to quote him.
- Robert Benchley (My Ten Years in a Quandary, 1936)
- I've dated men my age, younger than me and older. The only difference is the young ones are quicker at taking out the garbage.
- Lara Flynn Boyle
- I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man I keep his house.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor
- Bad men live that they may eat and drink, whereas good men eat and drink that they may live.
- The true man wants two things: danger and play. For that reason he wants woman, as the most dangerous plaything.
- Friedrich Nietzsche
- Talk to a man about himself and he will listen for hours.
- Benjamin Disraeli
- I like to wake up each morning feeling a new man.
- Jean Harlow
Mens Quotes Page 8